THREE SECRET RULES of BDSM

Before you go swallowing down bullshit people are spouting just because they’re self-proclaimed experts, keep in mind one thing: people who genuinely practice a healthy version of consensual BDSM don’t try to lock people down under labels, or tell people they’re “doing it wrong” (again, not counting safety issues). People who really ARE “experts” on BDSM know that everyone gets to define THEIR OWN LABEL. And that whatever label they want to label themselves as is THEIR decision, not anyone else’s. How one BDSM dynamic practices what they do might be drastically different than how another BDSM dynamic practices theirs. Neither is “wrong” as long as the THREE SECRET RULES of BDSM are being practiced:

  1. Everyone must be a human, consenting adult.
  2. Everyone must be either having fun or getting whatever it is they need out of the BDSM/power exchange dynamic.
  3. No on can be HARMED (as opposed to hurt, because some people WANT to be hurt) by the dynamic/play/power exchange.

That’s IT. Those are the SECRET RULES to BDSM. And any “expert” who tries to slap a shit-ton of rules and labels and other garbage onto it is basically in it for one thing–self-aggrandizement. (Or maybe money, if they’re trying to suck you into a book or a class of doing things their way.)

Strict Black Leather Flogging Whip on white background.